"When you love someone, you love the whole person, just as he or she is, and not as you would like them to be." -Leo Tolstoy, 19th Century Russian Writer and Philosopher, Leo Tolstoy books//

How many times have you been in love? I'm not talking about the number of times that you think you were in love, or all of the instances in which you were passionately attracted to another individual. I mean really in love with someone, caring about that person more than you do yourself and accepting him or her without wanting to change them. True love, as Tolstoy says, is about loving the "whole person" as they are, and "not as you would like them to be." True love is genuine and personal - it is a connection that extends beyond the bounds of friendship, although it does include those feelings, and it combines acceptance with accountability and forgiveness. In other words, true love is unconditional love. Many times, though, it seems that people love the idea or concept of being in a serious relationship with another person. The relationship is the object of their genuine affection, as opposed to the individual. As a result, conflict or dissatisfaction arises because one person, or both people, cannot conform to the ideal envisioned in the other's mind. Eventually, this kind of love becomes conditioned upon change, which is a recipe for failure. True love happens when you accept people for who they are without stipulations. Are you "in love" with your partner, or do you just love "the idea" of him or her? If it's true love, then be sure to cherish and celebrate it. However, if it's conceptual and not genuine, then you're cheating yourself and your partner out of something very special in life by hanging on to a fantasy that will never come true. Everyone deserves to find and experience true love, including you!